If I were asked..

If I were asked five years ago where did I see myself five years in the future...

I definitely wouldn't have said happy, married, happily married or loving my life; I wouldn't have said I would know that I was capable of loving another human being - my husband - so very much; or that I would ever find the one person I could be myself with - the real me who is a pampered brat, a grown up, a little girl with demands and an understanding yet stubborn teenager all at once!

I most definitely wouldn't have said cuddling my own baby, loving her kisses and her melt-my-heart smiles, waiting for her to roll, crawl, holding out my hands to her when she takes her first steps towards me or waiting for her to call me 'mama'

I most certainly would never have imagined I would have come to the US - second time in three years!

I don't think I would have even thought I would have lost Mickey - that he would have breathed his last on my lap, breaking my heart as it never had been broken, shattered to tiny pieces that just wouldn't fit back together until Allie..

I don't think I would have imagined that some friendships I held dear would suddenly fall apart, certain others would strengthen beyond my imagination..

I am practically sure I wouldn't have thought I could survive for more than a year at a time without seeing my Mom, or that I would (sometimes) not really want to talk to the Dad I worshipped as a kid or yearned to talk to non-stop when he was down on vacation..

I am not so sure I would have shared the relationship I currently do with God - which may not be exactly what is 'right' according to the church, but is something He and I are comfortable with..

I am so sure I wouldn't have said unemployed and loving it!!

And am also sure I wouldn't have thought I would ever take to 'blogging'

I don't think I would have reached a point where I was uncertain of my abilities to churn out good, solid, readable content without giving it too much thought

I certainly don't think I would say that I'd be second guessing my ability to get a job if I wanted or needed to..

But, as things stand today, this is exactly where I am - in a state (married) that had never crossed my mind five years ago, mother to my own baby (when I was completely happy 'mothering' my darling Mickey and Kyzie), happily unemployed (with some complaints here and there but overall not minding it) and in a country I never imagined I would go to (the US).. I guess this is where the saying 'Life happens when we are busy planning other things' applies :)