Choices=Confusion (!) (?)

Does it? Or doesn't it? - This could relate to anything from something I have chosen to buy or wear to make sense of or ignore.

Like the two choices above, in a day, I, and could also be you, face at least ten choices. Every.Single.Day. Tell me it is not so, and I will find you an ice cream cone in a desert (or maybe not!)These choices may be from something small - should I wear jeans or shorts - to something big - should we go on a vacation or put the money into our 'retirement fund'. And, trust me, whatever the choice, we will be left feeling that the alternative would have been better.

Take the route my thoughts were following today, for instance. Suddenly, out of the blue, I get thinking - Should I take up a full-time job or am I better off being a homemaker? Now, please note, it's been almost a year and a half that I have been working-from-home. With a little one keeping me busy all day, I do some work. I know that if I get to full-time work, I will get in more money, meet more people, focus on work better translating to better quality of work (which, considering I am an editor and doing the final QC, is a MUST), more confidence and a chance to break the mould I am settling a little too comfortably into.

Now on to the other side of the coin...working full-time means leaving my little one either in day-care or with mom. Missing out on her first step, her first word, being the first one she turns to for comfort, being the only one her eyes seek when she wakes up or her hand reaches for in her sleep, the only one who can sing her favorite lullaby, the only one who knows exactly why she's crying - poop / pee/ hunger / wanting to be held / just because. And much more.

It boils down to the 'paapi peth ka sawaal' v/s the 'maa ka dil' torment. Each with its own set of pros and cons. Whatever decision I take, I am still left wondering would choosing that alternative have made a difference? And a horde of other questions...cross-questioning the choice I have made.

How do I convince myself that I have made the right decision? How do I stop the questions and cross-questions? How do I tell myself that just because there are choices, they mustn't necessarily be accompanied by confusion? How?